She was also my favorite aunt. She had taken cake decoration classes once and made me a beautiful yellow and white frosted cake for my sixteenth birthday. She had spelled out "Happy 16th Birthday Angel" on the top in yellow icing. I let her get away with the Angel part because she was my favorite. She was the aunt we all loved to go visit, because we knew she would have mouth-watering things to eat, and we could sneak and listen to grown folks conversations about everybody else in town.
IT WAS AROUND 6:00 pm that Friday evening and Lin, Martha Ann, Mira, Mama, and I were sitting in the living room watching TV when the phone rang. My heart started pounding and my whole body heated up. I moved closer to the fan blowing in the window, hoping for some relief from the heat and started praying as I watched Mira swish over to the phone with those red, white, and blue hot pants on.
She had on a little bitty red t-shirt that was way too tight. All her stomach was showing between the tiny shirt and the hip hugging shorts. As usual she put on her smiley, I know you don't see me, but I am gorgeous voice when she answered the phone. "Hello .... yes mam, hold on a minute, here she is. Mama."
"Lord," I prayed, "Please don't let my dream come true; please don't let Mira give the phone to my mother. Please, Lord, don't let my auntie die." I watched my mother's face as all my fears played out in reality. The fan could have been blowing 20 degrees for all the good it did my body. I felt so hot inside and out and knew it would be a long time before I would feel comfortable again.
Mama was swaying a little on her feet. She was a light shade of pecan brown, but all the blood had left her face leaving her looking suddenly ashy.
Martha Ann asked, "Mama, what's wrong, what's happened?" She gave us all such a look of despair that I knew my dream had come true. My mother got off the phone and like a robot told Melinda to go and wake up daddy.
Aunt Elmira was to have had "minor" surgery on Monday morning; at least that's what my folks called it. Not being privy to all the adult talk, I took that to mean it was some sort of a female problem, but nothing too serious. I heard my mother and father talking about it the week before.
Mama was going to the hospital in Lakeview and stay with her during her surgery. Aunt Elmira would be in the hospital for about four to five days and mama would go back and forth to check on her. We didn't have a hospital in our little town of Pineville and had to go about twenty miles to Lakeview.
Mama joked and said, "Elmira gonna work herself into a fit about the surgery. She sure is worried about that place. You can't even talk about it without her shaking her head and saying those heifers better not mess with her."
We laughed, thinking nothing of it. We had no idea that auntie was that scared. She always laughed and joked about everything, never taking anything too seriously. You could go to her, and talk about anything and she would always say, "child, it's gonna be all right, just take it to the Lord in prayer."
A neighbor, Ms. Mattie was with her that Friday afternoon when auntie wouldn't stop talking about the upcoming surgery. Auntie was afraid of the hospital and felt the nurses wouldn't treat her the way they should. She was so nervous and frightened of the whole thing that she started having horrible chest pains and difficulty breathing.
Ms. Mattie said that auntie just kind of doubled over in her favorite chair in front of the TV right there in the living room. Ms. Mattie went running out of the house screaming for help.
One of the other neighbors, Mr. Henry ran over to see what was going on and went inside to Aunt Elmira. Mr. Henry saw Aunt Elmira lying across her chair and had the presence of mind to call the fire department.
We found out later she had a massive heart attack. The only thing we knew for sure of that night was she was gone.
That Friday night I asked God, "Why do you let me see these things? Why do you give me this gift, this curse, if I can't do anything about it?" What's the reason behind forewarning if I can't? What was I suppose to tell Aunt Elmira to change things?
Was there anything I could have changed if I had tried? I had so many questions and no answers, no answers at all. I prayed I wouldn't have the dreams, nobody wanted to hear me talk about them anyway and I didn't know why I was getting this unwanted information.
I had often times tried to tell my family before about my dreams. My daddy said I had the "sight" because I had been born with a "veil" over my face. He said he was the seventh son of a seventh son and had the gift also. I didn't know what he was talking about and frankly didn’t care.
I didn't know anything for sure, except I was confused and hurt and afraid. I was afraid to think about people, fearing I would dream something terrible about them.
My sisters often joked, "I hope Angela don't dream nothing about me, I don't want anything bad to happen to me." They would say it laughingly, but they meant it and it hurt. They would tell me I was different and
