CHAPTER 28
KATE PASSED AWAY the next morning with Thomas in her arms, and Theo and me by her side. I was hoping the smile that was plastered across her face the entire day prior remained as she went to the other side of that rainbow. Theo handled it well—better than I had expected. Although I wasn’t sure if that was just a façade for Thomas. It was as if he was switching gears from being his little sister’s protector to his nephew’s. It comforted me and scared me at the same time. He needed time to mourn properly, and it was as if he was doing everything in his power to avoid it.
The time he had been given to prepare for it was just a precursor to the actual event. Much like the few hours I had with Evan, from being informed he was on life support to making the harrowing decision after the doctors told me there was nothing that could possibly be done for him. Those few hours, I sat by his hospital bed with my eyes swollen shut from crying, praying for a miracle, willing him to defy the odds and just wake up. The same way Theo had been acting in the past few months with Kate.
When the time actually came and he was gone, it took a day or two to hit me—he was never coming back. I was wondering if and when that reality would finally hit Theo. I helped him with the arrangements, informing the funeral director of the dress Kate was to wear, and that her nails needed to be painted. He looked at me strangely when I handed over the bottle of pink polish, but I didn’t care—Kate would’ve wanted that.
When Theo had left the room for a few moments, I reached into my purse and took out the necklace I had my mother send me weeks ago when she had sent Evan’s items for his chest. It was a gold chain with half a heart and the word forever inscribed on it. Around my neck hung the other half with the word friends. Back when I was in the fifth grade, these necklaces were all the rage. Every girl had one that she shared with her BFF. I had saved up money from doing chores around the house and bought one, hoping one day I’d have someone to share the other half of that necklace with. That day never came until now. Kate was a friend I had found later in life. A friend who under normal circumstances would’ve been the exact opposite, but there was nothing normal about our situation. Just like the two of us, it was unique and flawed, yet so very beautiful.
“Please, make sure she has this around her neck,” I said to the funeral director, uncurling my hand to reveal the necklace just as Theo walked back into the room. As he looked at the heart in my hand and then at the one hanging around my neck, his bright green eyes exploded into tears. It was at that moment, it finally hit him. He quickly exited the room, and I went after him. I found him sitting outside on the porch steps of the funeral parlor with his face buried in his hands. I stood there quietly for a few moments before approaching him and taking a seat next to him. Rubbing his back, we sat in silence while he tried to collect his breaths.
“I’m so sorry, you must think I’m such a bloody baby.” He wiped his face with the back of his hand and met my gaze with red-rimmed eyes.
“Not at all,” I assured him. “I would’ve thought there was something wrong if you hadn’t broken down like this.”
“When my mum died, I promised her I’d look over Kate and not let anything bad happen to her. I just feel like I let them both down in so many ways.”
“Theo. How could you even think like that? You had no control over this horrible disease that overtook Kate. None! So, please stop feeling guilty. You did everything for her, and she knew that. So, you did keep your promise to both of them.”
He raked his hand through his hair and inhaled sharply. “Thank you, Jillian. Thank you for everything,” he whispered.
“No need to thank me.” I stretched my neck and placed a kiss on his cheek, tasting the salt on his tearstained skin. “Are you ready to go?” I asked, clasping his hand tightly. He nodded and that little boy persona I had fallen in love with shrouded his face.
I stood up first, and he followed after. Stopping when we got to the end of the walkway, he took both my hands in his and pulled me into his embrace.
“I love you so much,” he whispered softly in my ear, creating butterflies in my stomach, while providing me with the fullness my heart had been searching for.
If there was such a thing as beautiful where funeral services were concerned, Kate’s was all that and more. It was so reminiscent of who she was in life, and I was certain that she was somewhere close by with that angelic smile on her face, watching it take place. So many people had turned out, proving what a lovely person she was in life. One person in particular, who had shown up, a former coworker of hers named Noel, took me a little off guard when it dawned on me who he was. Evan and he had formed a friendship over their years of working together, and when I had accompanied Evan once on one of his London trips, I had met him. We both looked each other over, trying to place the familiarity before I figured it out first.
“I’m Evan O’Rourke’s wife,” I stammered.
The perplexity that was written all over his face instantly faded away once I made that clarification. “I thought I was
