“Right,” Tarrant orders. “You two research all that stuff. Morgan’s away until tomorrow, right?”
“Yeah,” Laura replies.
“So do your thing. I’m going to head out of town to see a friend. Get some info from him, seeing as he’s a single dad.”
“Who?” Laura asks.
“Coby.”
“Wow! He’s a single dad?” she murmurs, her eyes widening.
Tarrant runs his hand down his face. “Shit, don’t get any ideas, Lemon. I know how much he likes you,” he grumbles.
Laura smiles adoringly and leans in kissing his mouth.
“Okay, I’m off to get my laptop and do some research,” I tell them, disappearing up the stairs. I have a feeling, for a gay guy, my eyes are about to be truly opened.
The last month has rushed by.
In between classes, studying, trying to learn as much as I could on pregnancy, adoption, and even abortion, plus spending as much time as possible with Morgan, I’ve been stacked. Still, I feel like every moment with Morgan was worth it. Laura and I have been there for her and, with a little help, she finally felt strong enough to talk to Max. Now she’s moved in with him, Laura has moved in with Tarrant, and their dorm is officially no more.
I’ve made time to speak to Casper pretty regularly, but I’ve kept it light. Now I’m not on the football team, I’ve only seen him during our shared classes. That means it’s been easier, we’re not in each other’s faces. I spend my lunch with Laura and Tarrant, and often Solomon will join us, but I let the football team be. Neither Casper nor I have mentioned what happened, and I’m not sure whether I’m relieved or frustrated by that.
Art is the place where we share more of ourselves. I think there are two sides to him, the one he shows the world, and the one he shows me. I just need to work out which one is the real Casper. I haven’t pushed him, trying to give him as much space as I can, but when he thinks I’m otherwise occupied, I notice him looking. He can’t hide his interest in me anymore.
Our conversations never pass the point of causing change, though. I keep it safe… we keep it safe. I know if either of us stretches our boundaries right now, the fragile beginnings of any relationship which we might possibly create, could shatter.
“Ugh.” I shove myself away from my desk and walk over to the window. This house is cold and empty lately. Mom’s job is busier than ever. She’s in marketing now, moving up in the ranks. She works late more often than not, and with her job being an hour’s drive away, I barely see her.
Tarrant’s never here, opting instead to live above his garage. That leaves only me. On nights like this, when the rain is lashing down, and I’m home alone, I feel stuck. It’s ridiculous, I have my truck outside, but the problem is I have nowhere to go. I could text Solomon or Aaron and meet up with them, but I’m not feeling it at the moment. I don’t want to risk running into Tim and Den, my bullshit tolerance level is at an all-time low right now.
“Wonder what the time is?” I mutter to myself. Checking my watch, it’s a little after ten pm. “Fuck it!” I snap at nobody. Grabbing my jacket and shrugging it on, I do the only thing I can think of, I drive to the beach.
There’s no bonfires lighting the sand tonight, which is truly surprising as it’s a Saturday. Thankfully the rain has stopped, and there isn’t much wind, so I’m comfortably warm as I wander along the water’s edge. Without thinking too long and hard, I pull out my cell and text Casper.
Me: Hey, I wondered if you were busy. I’m walking the beach if you want to keep me company?
I hold the phone in front of me for a few seconds, waiting to see if he responds. The message tells me it’s been read, but those three little dots never appear, and Casper doesn’t reply.
I huff out a laugh at my stupidity and continue my jaunt, taking longer strides, eating up the sandy distance quicker than I first wanted to. The rocks where I often relax beckon me as I near them, so I take my place on the cold stone and pop in my earphones. I turn up the volume as Daughtry starts singing ‘It’s Not Over’ in my ears, but I don’t close my eyes.
Considering it was raining only thirty minutes ago, there are now no clouds in the sky, and the stars seem as though they were put there especially for my pleasure. My eyes start drooping, so I check my watch and see that only twenty minutes have passed. But out here, alone with the stars, I feel like it’s been hours. Getting up from the confines of the rocks, I pull out my earbuds. I’m about to walk back to my truck when Casper appears in front of me. He slams to a halt, seeming as surprised as I am.
“Oh.” It’s stupid, but it’s the only word able to free itself from my closed up throat. His lips quirk as he doesn’t quite smile, but in the moonlight, under the stars his eyes shine with amusement. “You didn’t respond to my text.” I shrug one shoulder. “I assumed you weren’t coming. I’m heading back to my truck.”
Casper looks behind him then turns back, his gaze travels over my shoulder. “How about we go sit? Unless you have to be somewhere?”
I’m not really sure why, but I want to tell him to go fuck himself, my anger is so sharp it’s piercing me from the inside out. There’s a shell surrounding
