Worse, I wanted to go back in there and do it all again. But I couldn't. It was wrong to have taken advantage of Gabbie like that. Clearly she'd had something on her mind. And instead of sitting down with her and having a conversation, I'd kissed her, then carried her up to our room and fucked her.
And I wanted to do it again.
Fuck. I shut my eyes, but images of her dark naked body danced in her mind. Her sweet moans. Her tightness. All I wanted to do was take her again.
I needed to stop allowing my dick to make decisions for me. I needed to get out of the house. Maybe if I put distance between the two of us, I could think clearly again. When I stepped back into the bedroom to get my clothes, I saw Gabbie still laying in the center of the bed. She was just as naked as she'd been in the kitchen, sound asleep.
It took all of my strength not to just crawl into bed with her. I couldn't do that. My dick had gotten me into this mess, and I wouldn’t reward it. No, I needed to just get dressed and leave. And that was what I did.
For a while, I drove around aimlessly. How could I set things right? What I'd done was unforgivable. I'd used my position to gratify myself, taking advantage of a woman who trusted me.
Before I knew it, I pulled up in front of Christian's house. Putting the car in park, I stared up at it. The lights were on. No doubt he'd come straight home after leaving the house. Aspen's car wasn't there, and I let out a breath, glad my youngest brother wasn't around. I had no idea what I would say to him. He was the closet one of us to Gabbie, probably closer than even I was. How could I ever face him once he knew what I'd done?
Hell, I wasn't even sure how I would face Christian.
But I had to talk to somebody. I couldn't do this on my own. I'd tried for so long to be able to do everyone by myself and look where that had gotten me. Maybe if I talked to Christian, he could help me figure out how to apologize to Gabbie.
Letting out a breath, I got out of the car and stalked up to the front door. I skipped the doorbell and just pounded on the large, wooden door, glad Jade was out of town. It took a few moments of banging before the door was finally yanked open. Christian stood there, filling the doorway, glaring, until he noticed it was me standing there.
"Nick?" he asked, his brow scrunched up in confusion. "What the Hell are you doing here?"
"I fucked up," was all I could think to say.
Christian nodded and led me inside, taking me to his study. I plopped down and tried to fight back the wave of emotions tearing through me. God, how could I have been so stupid? How could I have let myself get into such a fucking mess?
"Here," Christian said, jarring me out of my thoughts. He handed me a glass of amber liquid, and I stared at it for a moment before finally taking it. For a long while, I stared at the liquid. Part of me wanted to down it all in one go, but I wasn't sure that was a good idea. I hadn't been drunk earlier, and I'd fucked everything up. How would I fix things if I got drunk now?
Christian moved and sat down across from me, his own glass in hand. I could feel his gaze on me, piercing through me, like he could read my mind. But that was just my overactive imagination. It would be far too easy if Christian could just look into my mind and see just how I'd fucked up. Then I wouldn't have to relive it all by explaining everything to him.
But as he sat there watching me, I knew he was waiting for me to fill him in on why I'd just shown up on his doorstep out of the blue. So I did. I kept my gaze locked on the amber liquid, swirling around in the glass, as the words came out. Christian didn't speak for even a moment once I talked. He just sat there listening to the word vomit that came out of my mouth.
I was glad for his silence. If he'd stopped me to ask questions, I wasn't sure I'd have been able to keep going. When it finally all came out, I brought the glass to my lips and downed it. The Scotch was smooth as it went down, the heat washing through me. I closed my eyes and focused on the numbing feeling already working its way through my body.
"God, you're an idiot," Christian said at last, forcing me to open my eyes. He watched me with pursed lips, shaking his head. "You know, when all the shit was going on with me and Jade, I thought I had to be the dumbest man on the planet. It's good to see that wasn't true. You are the dumbest man on the planet."
I stared at him, mouth hanging open. Part of me wanted to argue with him. It was hard to clamp down on the brotherly instinct to respond to an attack. But I couldn't do it. Christian wasn't wrong. I was the dumbest man on the planet, no doubt about it. Nothing I said would've been able to change that.
Christian took a sip of his own glass, then set it down on the armrest of the chair, leaning forward and clasping his hands together. He fixed me with his gaze again, pinning me in place with just a look. "Gabriella loves you, you dumbass. She's always loved you. You've just had your head up your ass for so long you didn't realize
