My heart thundered in my chest. There wasn’t a part of my body that wasn’t on high alert with what I was about to do. Panic flushed through me because this wasn’t who I was, I wasn’t the kisser, I was the kissee. I definitely wasn’t the forceful, demanding person I was being right now, but he wasn’t going to do it.
And I needed to know.
I needed to know if my heartbeats and my butterflies and my goosebumps were really because of him.
Because if they were, I’d deal with my brother myself.
“Kinsley,” Josh breathed. “This is a terrible idea.”
“I know,” I whispered right back.
“You don’t know what you’re doing.”
“Actually, I do.”
I proved the truth in my words by pressing my lips against his.
He froze completely, and I just held my mouth there, savoring the way the warmth of his lips flooded through my body. There was a shuffle as he moved closer to me, and I slid my hands up his chest like I’d imagined earlier.
It was solid muscle, all dips and valleys and hardness that guided my hands to the sides of his neck.
His lips twitched.
There was no denying it.
The butterflies in my stomach were staging a breakout. My heart was the ringleader of that as it pounded against my ribcage, and my skin was prickled in preparation for their great escape.
I was feeling things for Josh, and there was no way I could hide that from myself any longer.
Or him.
I fell back onto my heels from my tiptoes, breaking the seal of our lips.
“There,” I said softly, letting my hands fall away. “I have my answer, and you didn’t break any promises.”
“What’s your answer?” he replied in a low, gruff voice I’d never heard before.
I raised my eyes to his briefly before I turned away. “I’m not insane.”
“But I am.”
He grabbed my hand and spun me right back into him. I squeaked as my body collided with his, but there was barely any time before his lips covered mine.
Like it was second nature, he wrapped one arm around my waist, holding me against him, and I circled my arms around his neck.
He kissed me thoroughly, like he’d dreamed of doing it a thousand times. Maybe he had. I didn’t know, and I didn’t care. All I cared about was that he was kissing me like he’d die if he didn’t.
However long he’d felt the things he felt right now, this was it. This was the release of all those feelings. This was the dam that broke and flooded the whole damn river.
We staggered back toward the bookcase, and for the first time in my life I was glad it was bolted to the ground. The shelves pressed against my back, but I didn’t care. I could feel nothing but the ferocity in Josh’s kiss.
This was wrong. My brain was screaming at me to stop, but my body wouldn’t let me. There was no possible way I could pull away from him right now, especially since I’d technically instigated it.
I was on fire everywhere.
Head. Toes. Fingers. Shoulders. Thighs.
Clitoris.
Hey, I said everywhere.
We shuffled to the side until there was no more bookcase but there was plenty of desk. I fell backward like the awkward turtle I was, and before I knew it, my ass was planted on the desk and Josh was standing between my legs as my dress rode up my thighs indecently.
The chill sent more goosebumps over my skin, but the sensation of his rough palm running along my skin dispelled them quickly.
I cupped the back of his head and kissed him with the same hunger he was kissing me with. My body had taken full control now, and it didn’t matter how many times my brain whispered that this was wrong and this was Josh and this was wrong wrong wrong wrong.
I no longer had control of myself.
And I’d never been more thankful of that.
Kissing Josh was… God. It was the kiss I’d waited my whole life for. It was the kiss I’d read about a thousand times over in my books. It was the kiss that romance novel heroines said was everything and more, the one they felt in their bones, the one that would stay with them for the rest of their life.
But quite simply, kissing Josh was one thing.
It was right.
The situation may have been wrong but kissing him was oh so right.
It was shelter in a snowstorm. Dry socks after wading through a puddle. Sunlight breaking through clouds after the rain. Reading in front of the fire. Marshmallows in hot cocoa. Chocolate on strawberries. Cheese in sandwiches.
The click of your key as your front door unlocked after being at work all day.
Kissing Josh was like coming home.
The safest space you could ever have, the one place you felt truly happy.
That was it.
That was how I felt right now.
As his fingers probed my skin and his erection pressed against my clitoris through his jeans and his tongue stroked mine and my entire body went into wildfire mode, I knew.
This was right.
It would always be right.
“Oh, shit!”
At the sound of Holley’s voice, we broke apart like we’d literally set fire to one another.
She stood in the doorway with her phone in her hand, staring at us wide-eyed as her wide-rimmed glasses fell down her nose. “I just—”
I opened my mouth, but nothing at all came out.
Josh did the same.
“Hello,” Holley finally said after a moment of the world’s most uncomfortable silence. She fought to contain the smile that was stretching across her face, but she wasn’t doing a very thorough job because she lost.
Josh rubbed his nose. “I… I should probably go.”
Wide-eyed and wide-smiled, Holley nodded in agreement.
I didn’t move. I couldn’t. Had we been so caught up in kissing that we hadn’t heard her come in? Was that possible?
Damn it.
I was so screwed.
Josh grabbed his jacket
