“What are you doing?” She bit out.
“It’s cold, Ry. Will you please just let me be your damn friend.”
I tugged her up against me. At first she rested her hands against my chest, keeping herself at a distance, but then she slowly gave into the comfort of warmth my body offered and nestled her face up against my chest as my arms wrapped around her.
“This doesn’t mean we are friends again.” She warned.
I grinned. “Well, it sure feels like we are.”
I couldn't see her face, but something told me she was smiling. I held her tightly against me as I hugged her for the first time in years. I had nearly forgotten how good it felt to hold my best friend in my arms.
Often, as teenagers, we found ourselves in the treehouse late at night. I could still remember how it felt to have her snuggled up against me for warmth, her head laying on my chest.
“It's not like I didn’t miss having you around.” She finally admitted and I felt the warmth of her breath against my body.
“I've missed you too, Ry.” I admitted, as I hugged her tighter. A moment of complete serenity rushing over me.
That was the thing about Ryder, though. She was so unaware of how much control she had over me. It was I who fed off scraps for all those years. A kiss, a hug, or even a touch. Anything that I could take without being obvious.
Now, standing here, holding her in my arms. I felt like I was the one who’d left home all those years ago, and now I was home again.
She nuzzled up closer to me and a painful reality hit me in the chest. Even if we were making up, she would still be gone in a few days. It was something I hadn't thought about in my desperation to see her.
No matter what changed in the next two days, I’d still be losing her all over again.
Chapter 11
Ryder
When he first pulled me into his arms, I was resistant. Yet, the second I felt the familiar warmth of Tyler's embrace, I was lost to it.
I felt like a little girl again, just aching for his reassurance.
Then I let those words slip out, like an idiot. “It's not like I didn’t miss having you around.”
I felt his arms tighten around me a bit, as if I’d just let him off a life sentence of my silence.
“I've missed you too, Ry.”
Why is it those words felt so good to hear? He’d said them to me numerous times the first year I was away. He reached out to me and begged me to talk to him for twelve months straight. Yet, tonight it felt like it was all I’d been waiting for.
The reason I was successful in avoiding Tyler all those years was because Kirk and Sadie kept me under 'Tyler watch’. They monitored my calls and texts for two years straight. Once, I almost gave in and they made me change my number so he couldn't reach me anymore. After that, I didn't hear from him anymore and distracting myself became easier.
Tonight though, there were no distractions. No one was on ‘Tyler watch' and there was just Tyler, and I.
“Do you want to go inside?” I asked, feeling nervous about being alone with him now.
“Nah, I think I made a pretty powerful exit already.” He chuckled and I blushed at the reminder of yelling at him.
“Are you staying with your parents?” I asked, somewhat hopeful.
He shook his head. “I bought my own place about five miles from here.”
“Oh wow, set up roots here and everything?”
“Yeah, it’s home. A good place to raise a family.”
I pulled away from him, probably too abruptly because he looked at me questionably. The thought had never crossed my mind until now. Did he have a girlfriend, a wife, or a family? I never asked my parents about him; it was easier not knowing.
It would hurt to much.
“I better head in. I have a long few days ahead of me.” I offered a smile, in hopes it would distract him from my shifty behavior.
“Can we grab lunch tomorrow?” He asked.
I hesitated. “Um, let me find out what Kirk wants to do, and I’ll let you know. Maybe we can do a double date?”
The words came out of me so quickly. Apparently, my need to know if he was with someone was stronger than my desire to avoid the truth.
“Oh, uh yeah. Sure.” His expression was hard to read. He seemed disappointed but he still agreed to meet up in pairs.
“I assume that you’re seeing someone…” I stated, fishing for more information.
“No. I can get a date for lunch if I need one though.”
I rolled my eyes. “Typical.”
He raised his eyebrow. “What is that supposed to mean?”
I shrugged. “Some things never change. You always did have an endless supply of girls.”
He rolled his eyes. “Now you sound like my mom. It's not even like that. I date on occasion, just for the company. I haven't found the right girl to settle down with is all.”
Another reminder that no matter how close we were, I was still never enough. Never the right girl.
No one was.
The idea of him touching someone else had become a dormant thought in my life. Now, as it flooded back to me, my chest constricted with that familiar pain of jealousy.
“Ry?” He questioned.
Sometimes it sucked having someone who could read you so easily when you wanted to keep your emotions hidden.
“Forget it, Ty. Maybe this little reconciliation wasn’t a good idea.” I turned to head back
