I just wished I could have the other thing I had hoped for so hard, my parents. I longed to feel my Mom and Dad holding me again, to hear my Mom’s voice and my Dad’s booming laugh. I missed them so much. I hadn’t been given enough time with them, far too much of their short lives spent with me locked away in The Darkness. I missed them so damned much.
“Kyle?” I whispered, hoping he wasn’t asleep.
“Yes Princess?”
“Do you th-think you could take me to my parents? To their graves? I never got to say goodbye to them.” My words quickly descended into whimpers, and instantly I was pulled even higher on top of Kyle and pressed into his upper body tightly.
“Of course. I need to look into the details, but I promise we will take you as soon as possible, if that’s what you want?”
“I do. I need to let them know I’m safe. I need to feel them close…...in some way, even if it has to be a grave.”
“I’m so sorry, baby.” Kyle whispered as I just sobbed into his bare chest.
We didn’t speak anymore. Eventually I cried myself to sleep in his arms, the feel of him holding me, the only thing seeming to keep me from completely unravelling that night.
***
“Morning, Cariña.” Matt said with a sexy smile from where he was cooking at the stove. He, Cole and Kade were all in the kitchen, Kade making coffee, and Cole sat at the island playing on his cell.
I had a rough night the previous night, waking twice more with nightmares. I didn’t think poor Kyle had slept a wink, and we were both exhausted as we took it in turns to shower and dress before coming down for breakfast.
Keira and Grant had both returned to work that day, but I had already had texts from both of them, checking in, even though they’d only been out an hour. It was nice to know how much they cared though, so I embraced it. I had been home three days, and throughout those days they had both hovered, keeping an eye on me and seeming to be checking that I really was as ok as I told them all I was. I knew they were worried about the guys too, and how everything had affected them all. I had seen them watching the four guys closely and casually checking in with them, more than usual. They must have been satisfied enough in the end though, to return to their jobs and I was glad. All I really wanted was for everyone to just get back to normal,
“Morning.” I replied with a shaky smile as I took a seat beside Cole. Kyle helped me get settled, and then took my crutches from me.
True to their word they had all let me use the crutches since I spoke to them, except for on the stairs. They refused to let me manage the stairs alone, and I had decided to just concede on that point for the time being.
“How’d you sleep?” Cole asked as he dropped his cell, and turned his full attention on me.
“Not great.” I admitted.
“Rough night,” Kyle agreed, sitting beside me at the island. “Three bad nightmares.” I felt terrible about how exhausted Kyle looked, as he desperately took coffee from Kade.
“You should have stayed in bed longer.” Cole suggested as he pulled me in for a bear hug.
“I couldn’t. One more nightmare, and I was going to have a breakdown.” I sighed.
“Maybe you should consider talking to someone?” Kade asked tentatively. This had already been a bone of contention between us all. I opened my mouth to argue, and Kade stopped me. “I know you don’t like the idea, but we’d get you the best, Livy. Someone who really knows what you need.”
“What I need is already right here, Kade. I can get through this, with you guys, and the family. I don’t need strangers making me talk about things I’m not ready to deal with.” I said firmly, too tired to sugar coat it.
“I agree. After everything Livy has been through she needs to be surrounded by love and family, not strangers. We can get her through this.” Matt agreed, and I smiled at him gratefully for backing me up, as always.
“I agree too, whatever Livy needs.” Cole added, as he squeezed me even tighter against his side.
“I’m not trying to strongarm you, Love. I’m just suggesting you consider it.”
“He’s right Liv, just keep it in mind. It worked for me. I did twelve mandatory sessions when I started working for Rob, and much as I hated them, they did help me a lot.” Kyle added.
“I’ll think about it.” I conceded, though I had no intention of ever actually agreeing. I had been alone for eight years. I didn't need a stranger to get me through everything, I needed safety and love, and I had that in spades.
“Pancakes, Cariña?” Matt offered, as he started stacking them on plates. “I have syrup and strawberries.” He added, knowing I couldn't resist the sugar.
“Maybe just one then, please.” I replied with a smile. I had to try when he’d gone to the effort.
“Give her two, Matt.” Kyle ordered as he stared me down, daring me to argue. I shook my head at him, but didn’t put up a fight. I knew I needed to eat. During the recent weeks in the hospital, I had lost a lot of the weight that I had gained in the weeks before I was taken. I was now almost as thin as I had been the first day I arrived there. I knew I needed to try, but food was just so hard for me to face most days.
The guys all started talking
