But I walked into the suite, ready to apologize and grovel at her feet after a miserable day at the park without her, and found she wasn’t there.
Her suitcase had been packed, and she had moved out of my room without leaving a goodbye note, or a conversation, or a knock-down drag-out fight until all our cards were face up on the table and we had emptied our combined emotional baggage.
I felt abandoned, even though I deserved it.
Before giving up and writing this entire trip off as a loss, I made an honest effort to find her by going to the room she shared with Tracy. I was met with a plastic baseball bat to the face and body at Tracy’s hand. When she’d bent the bat so badly she could no longer use it, Kevin calmly took it from her hands and told me to have a seat.
“Where is Daisy?” I crossed my arm over my chest.
“How the hell should I know? You’re the one sharing a room with her now.” Tracy stood over me, her eyes firing daggers at me.
“Apparently not. All her things, including her suitcase, are gone. I thought maybe she came back to your room.”
Tracy froze, her eyes grew wide as her jaw dropped open. She grabbed her cell phone to call Daisy, keeping her glare trained on me while she spoke. At least then I knew Daisy was safe and in her own room, but knowing she’d rather be alone than spend one more minute with me was a jagged pill to swallow. Tracy made sure I didn’t follow her to Daisy’s new room, so I devised a plan to find her on my own.
After a quick search on my phone, I located a florist nearby that offered same-day delivery. When I called and explained I’d severely screwed up and needed to make amends immediately, the friendly lady on the other end understood my plight and took mercy on me. Two dozen red roses and $500 later, the flowers arrived at the front desk. I watched the box like a hawk until the concierge picked it up to deliver it to her room.
Now I’m following him.
Like a crazy stalker.
But I have no intentions of hurting her. Not that my exploits are completely benign since she said she didn’t want to talk to me and didn’t want me to know which room she’s in. I’m not respecting her wishes, but my desperation to fix the situation is driving me to extreme measures. I’m risking everything only to talk to her through the door, to make one last-ditch attempt to show her I’m not the completely self-absorbed asshole she believes me to be.
That I’ve shown her I am.
When she opens the door, the concierge offers the box with the long stem roses in it and she hesitantly accepts it. He carries on his way, leaving the hallway empty except for the lurker waiting in the wings. My feet carry me to the door before I realize I decided to move.
I knock softly and sit with my back against the door before beginning my monologue. She needs to know it’s me before she reaches the door, so she’s not startled by my presence. The last thing I want is for her to be afraid of me, to think I’m here for anything other than to apologize profusely.
“Daisy, it’s me. You don’t have to say a word or even crack the door open. I’m not here to harass you or debate anything I’ve said or done. My only objective is to tell you how very sorry I am for today, everything about it. You have been nothing short of amazing. I’ve had more fun with you in the last week than I can ever remember, no matter what we were doing. You have an incredible heart, an infectious laugh, and a beautiful soul. It’s a cliché, and it sounds like a really cheesy line, but what I’m about to say is the honest to God truth. Every minute I’ve spent with you has made me want to be a better man, because that’s exactly what you deserve, nothing less. You bring out the best in me.
“When I woke this morning, I was nowhere near being the man you should want. Old memories resurfaced and brought me back down to the tenth level of hell, my own private floor. My thoughts tormented me, and I did what I always do when I can’t deal with the past. I pushed you away, even though that isn’t what I want. But you didn’t give up on me, you walked beside me, quietly and patiently giving me space to deal with myself.
“Deep inside my soul, I know I deserve nothing you have to give me, and that fact made me even madder, at myself, so I pushed harder. The girl at the water park couldn’t hold a candle to you. No one can, to be honest. I’m so sorry that my inadequacies and insecurities hurt you, and I’m so sorry I hurt you.”
Now that I’ve put my heart and my pride on the line, all I can do is wait to see how she’ll respond. Will she open the door and let me back in her life? Will she pretend she didn’t hear any of my confession and apology? Will she simply thank me and go on without me?
I close my eyes and lean my head against the door, not caring that I’m sitting on the floor, in the hallway, of an upscale luxury resort. I’ll wait here all night for her answer if that’s what it takes.
Then I hear the sound of metal sliding against metal and the distinct click of her deadbolt locking in place.
That wasn’t the answer I hoped
