Xavier
Hours later and I’m still thinking about Cassi and what she said to me.
You need to grow the fuck up.
At the time, it made my blood boil. How dare she tell me to grow up when she used sex to deal with her grief?
Then I watched her walk away, resisting the urge to pull her back by holding onto my pride.
Laying here in bed staring at the ceiling, I learn a very important lesson.
Pride doesn’t keep you warm at night. It doesn’t fill the gaping hole in my chest from the woman I have fallen madly in love with.
I’m in love with Cassi.
I sit up straight, finally admitting to myself what I think I’ve known all along.
I pick up my phone immediately and dial her number. It rings before going to voicemail.
I hang up, trying again, but this time it goes straight to voicemail.
Fuck.
She either blocked me or turned her phone off. One quick way to find out which.
I call Jack. He answers on the first ring.
“What’s up, bro?”
“Hey, can you try calling Cassi?”
“You actually want me to call your girl? Is this a test? Bro’s before ho’s, man.”
I would punch him if I could. “Don’t you dare call her a ho. I fucked up, man. I think she might have blocked my number. Just try, okay?”
“Stop fucking up, man. Cassi’s a great girl. You need to get your shit together or let her go.” The stern, lecturing tone catches me by surprise.
“Seriously, man? Like two seconds ago you said you’d pick me over her. Now you’re taking her side?”
“Well, yeah. I meant I wouldn’t sleep with her or encroach on your territory, but she’s a good girl. She’s my friend. I won’t let you break her heart, man.”
I grimace.
Too late.
I’m glad she has Jack in her corner, though. She deserves it, but I can’t lie and say it doesn’t gut me, it’s not me.
“Point made. Now, will you call her?”
“Yeah, man.”
He hangs up. I wait for what seems like forever for him to call back.
“Straight to voicemail, man. I texted her though. I’ll let you know if she texts back.”
“Thanks, man.”
I pace my room, thinking about where she might be. I don’t stay still long though. Before I know it, I have my keys in my hand, heading to the car.
I go to her dorm first. Rebecca lets me have an earful when she sees me. I don’t think she even knows what happened, but she said the fact that I was looking for her and her phone was off meant I must’ve done something fucked up. I let her lecture me for ten minutes before leaving.
I tried the ice cream shop next. She said once that when she’s sad; she likes to come here and have a cone of strawberry ice cream with real strawberries mixed in.
Unfortunately, she must be more pissed than sad because she’s not here.
My chest grows tight as I check the bar, the library, and the park and still no sign of her.
I keep trying to call her too. Leaving her messages, begging her to call me back.
I take one last shot in the dark and try the old lake about thirty minutes outside of town. The same one she and Ryan used to go to.
I feel guilty as I pull up to the parking area. For a moment, I don’t want to walk down to the clearing. I don’t want to taint this place for her. It takes a couple of minutes for me to realize it was pointless, anyway. Her car isn’t here.
I get out anyway and travel down the area, remembering the conversation we had. Remembering her worries about this place being altered by others as the popularity of the little lake grows.
I walk over to the tree they marked and run my fingers over their initials.
I feel my phone ding and my heart skips a beat.
I’m disappointed when I see Rebecca’s name instead of Cassi’s.
She’s at her parents’. Don’t make me regret this.
A moment later another text comes through.
Hurt my girl again and you won’t be procreating buddy.
I smile.
Won’t be an issue.
I reply, adding a thanks at the last minute.
I know where she is, now I’m going to go get my girl.
Ten at night. Not late by college standards, but by proper standards to show up to the girl you love parents’ house.
I pull into the driveway, taking a minute to collect my thoughts before I get out. Before I get to the door it swings open, a furious Jerry standing in the door with a shotgun.
“What are you doing here, son?” he demands.
“I was hoping to talk to Cassi.” I met his eyes, not flinching as he moves the barrel a little lower, almost as if he’s considering pointing it at me.
“I don’t know what you did to her, but I have no problem making your death look like an accident.” His voice is eerily calm.
“Daddy, put the gun down.” I let out a breath as I see her.
Cassi. My Cassi.
She’s gorgeous as ever in a pair of pajama pants and a tank top. Her eyes look red from crying, if I had to guess. My heart aches at the thought of her crying, but even more so at the thought of me causing those tears.
“Cassi, honey. This is not the time for a young man to show up at your door.”
“Daddy, I turned off my phone. He was probably worried about me and wants to make sure I’m okay. You’re getting all bent out of shape for nothing.”
Jerry relaxes at that, looking back to me. “The threat still stands.”
“Heard loud and clear, sir.”
Cassi grabs a jacket, before slipping by her dad, closing the door behind her. She doesn’t speak right away, stepping off the porch, walking toward my car.
I follow her, almost running into her when she abruptly turns to face me. My hands reach up to grab her arms, steadying her, but she immediately pulls back.
I frown. “Cass, I…” I start, but she
