Now would be the right time to explain myself. I open my mouth to say the words but they don’t come. I try a second time and she stares expectantly but I close my mouth. I don’t want her to come back out of pity. Once the treatment is finished, I don’t have to tell her a thing. “I’m sorry you think that,” I eventually say, “but we’re going to the counsellor tomorrow. Now, get some sleep.”
Her eyes widen and I turn away, continuing to undress. “Did you sleep with someone else?” she asks. “I’ve been wanting to ask since the first time you rejected me. I was wearing a new red lace bodice. You looked me up and down and told me you weren’t feeling well. I watched you get into bed and turn your back to me. I asked you what was wrong and you said I wouldn’t understand.”
“I remember,” I mutter. She looked sexy and it killed me to turn her away, but it was my first day of treatment and I was so tired and weak.
“And I cried silent tears beside you, wondering if you’d had sex with another woman and guilt was eating you alive. Is that it? Did you cheat?”
“I haven’t had sex with another woman,” I say firmly. “I haven’t cheated on you.”
“Except with Raven,” she says.
“Not even with Raven,” I confirm.
“Just because we separated, doesn’t mean it’s okay to have sex with another woman. We’re still married.”
“I haven’t had sex with her,” I say. “I swear on Ziggy’s life.”
“I don’t even know why we’re discussing this. It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“Have you had sex with another man?” I ask and brace myself for her answer.
“Would you give a shit if I had?” she asks.
My fists clench and hot rage burns through my body. “I’d kill any man who laid a finger on you. You’re mine,” I hiss.
She rolls her eyes. “To think that used to make me feel safe and loved. Now, it boils my blood.”
“We’re getting nowhere like this.” I sigh. “Let’s sleep. We can talk tomorrow.”
She shakes her head. “No.”
“No?” I repeat.
She pushes past me and heads for the door. “I need a drink.”
Chapter Seven
ANNA
“Someone looks tired,” says Eva.
“Why are you still awake?” I ask, looking around the club bar. It’s almost one in the morning and the club is quiet with only a few brothers hanging around.
“Sometimes I just need space, yah know?” she mutters.
I frown. “Things okay with you and Cree?” I ask.
She nods and forces a smile. “Things are good,” she says and I raise a brow in doubt. She’s quick to put me right. “No, they really are. I’ve just never had a guy be so full-on. He’s . . .” she pauses, looking for the right word. “Obsessed.”
“With you or sex?”
“Both,” she says, smiling. “I’m not saying it’s a bad thing cos I love him, I really love him, but sometimes he’s too much and I have to take a break. He’s always nearby, always within my eyeline. In bed, he wraps himself around me, it’s like he’s scared I’m gonna disappear.”
“Have you talked to him about it?” I ask.
She shakes her head. “He doesn’t like to talk, you know what he’s like. I’m thinking of speaking to his counsellor,” she says.
I roll my eyes. “Maybe I can help there. Riggs is forcing me into seeing her with him.”
“He can’t force you to talk,” she says, shrugging.
“A part of me wants to go just so I can say it in front of her. Maybe then she can explain it to him because he sure as shit isn’t understanding it from me,” I mutter.
“Say what?”
“That I’m done. That I’m happy, and for once in my life, it doesn’t involve a man.”
“Wow,” says Eva. “That’s huge. Good for you. You don’t love him?”
“I’ll always love him. But I’m done trying to be his wife. He’s hurt me too much. At least with Reggie, I knew what he was like. His physical abuse was what I expected. Riggs, he drew me in and then turned. He’s hurt me more than Reggie’s fists ever could.”
Eva sucks in a breath and her eyes widen. I wince and slowly turn to see who she’s looking at, even though I’ve already guessed that Riggs is there. He stares at me for a long minute, a range of emotions pass over his face. “I’ll take you home,” he mutters. My heart twinges again and Eva gives me a sympathetic smile.
Outside, he hands me a helmet and gets on the bike without looking at me. I stand beside him. “Riggs,” I begin.
“Forget it, Anna. Get on.”
“I didn’t mean—”
“I know what you meant. Get on.” He’s staring straight ahead rigidly and his hands are gripping the handlebars tight. I decide it isn’t worth pushing and I get on the bike. He shifts uncomfortably, stiffening when I wrap my arms around him. It breaks my heart all over again, reminding me of how things got between us before I left.
He stops outside my house but makes no move to get off the bike. I hand him my helmet and smile sadly. “If I knew you were there, I wouldn’t have been so harsh,” I say.
“Then maybe it’s a good thing I was. Sorry I was so pushy. I’ll go and
