The Taming of the Shrew

have a stomach, to’t i’ God’s name:
You shall have me assisting you in all.
But will you woo this wild-cat? Petruchio Will I live? Grumio Will he woo her? ay, or I’ll hang her. Petruchio

Why came I hither but to that intent?
Think you a little din can daunt mine ears?
Have I not in my time heard lions roar?
Have I not heard the sea puff’d up with winds
Rage like an angry boar chafed with sweat?
Have I not heard great ordnance in the field,
And heaven’s artillery thunder in the skies?
Have I not in a pitched battle heard
Loud ’larums, neighing steeds, and trumpets’ clang?
And do you tell me of a woman’s tongue,
That gives not half so great a blow to hear
As will a chestnut in a farmer’s fire?
Tush, tush! fear boys with bugs.

Grumio For he fears none. Gremio

Hortensio, hark:
This gentleman is happily arrived,
My mind presumes, for his own good and ours.

Hortensio

I promised we would be contributors
And bear his charging of wooing, whatsoe’er.

Gremio And so we will, provided that he win her. Grumio I would I were as sure of a good dinner. Enter Tranio brave, and Biondello. Tranio

Gentlemen, God save you. If I may be bold,
Tell me, I beseech you, which is the readiest way
To the house of Signior Baptista Minola?

Biondello He that has the two fair daughters: is’t he you mean? Tranio Even he, Biondello. Gremio Hark you, sir; you mean not her to⁠— Tranio Perhaps, him and her, sir: what have you to do? Petruchio Not her that chides, sir, at any hand, I pray. Tranio I love no chiders, sir. Biondello, let’s away. Lucentio Well begun, Tranio. Hortensio

Sir, a word ere you go;
Are you a suitor to the maid you talk of, yea or no?

Tranio And if I be, sir, is it any offence? Gremio No; if without more words you will get you hence. Tranio

Why, sir, I pray, are not the streets as free
For me as for you?

Gremio But so is not she. Tranio For what reason, I beseech you? Gremio

For this reason, if you’ll know,
That she’s the choice love of Signior Gremio.

Hortensio That she’s the chosen of Signior Hortensio. Tranio

Softly, my masters! if you be gentlemen,
Do me this right; hear me with patience.
Baptista is a noble gentleman,
To whom my father is not all unknown;
And were his daughter fairer than she is,
She may more suitors have and me for one.
Fair Leda’s daughter had a thousand wooers;
Then well one more may fair Bianca have:
And so she shall; Lucentio shall make one,
Though Paris came in hope to speed alone.

Gremio What! this gentleman will out-talk us all. Lucentio Sir, give him head: I know he’ll prove a jade. Petruchio Hortensio, to what end are all these words? Hortensio

Sir, let me be so bold as ask you,
Did you yet ever see Baptista’s daughter?

Tranio

No, sir; but hear I do that he hath two,
The one as famous for a scolding tongue
As is the other for beauteous modesty.

Petruchio Sir, sir, the first’s for me; let her go by. Gremio

Yea, leave that labour to great Hercules;
And let it be more than Alcides’ twelve.

Petruchio

Sir, understand you this of me in sooth:
The youngest daughter whom you hearken for
Her father keeps from all access of suitors,
And will not promise her to any man
Until the elder sister first be wed:
The younger then is free and not before.

Tranio

If it be so, sir, that you are the man
Must stead us all and me amongst the rest,
And if you break the ice and do this feat,
Achieve the elder, set the younger free
For our access, whose hap shall be to have her
Will not so graceless be to be ingrate.

Hortensio

Sir, you say well and well you do conceive;
And since you do profess to be a suitor,
You must, as we do, gratify this gentleman,
To whom we all rest generally beholding.

Tranio

Sir, I shall not be slack: in sign whereof,
Please ye we may contrive this afternoon,
And quaff carouses to our mistress’ health,
And do as adversaries do in law,
Strive mightily, but eat and drink as friends.

Grumio
Biondello O excellent motion! Fellows, let’s be gone. Hortensio

The motion’s good indeed and be it so,
Petruchio, I shall be your ben venuto. Exeunt.

Act II

Scene I

Padua. A room in Baptista’s house.

	Enter Katharina and Bianca.
Bianca	Good sister, wrong me not, nor wrong yourself, To make a bondmaid and a slave of me; That I disdain: but for these other gawds, Unbind my hands, I’ll pull them off myself, Yea, all my raiment, to my petticoat; Or what you will command me will I do, So well I know my duty to my elders.
Katharina	Of all thy suitors, here I charge thee, tell Whom thou lovest best: see thou dissemble not.
Bianca	Believe me, sister, of all the men alive I never yet beheld that special face Which I could fancy more than any other.
Katharina	Minion, thou liest. Is’t not Hortensio?
Bianca	If you affect him, sister, here I swear I’ll plead for you myself, but you shall have him.
Katharina	O then, belike, you fancy riches more: You will have Gremio to keep you fair.
Bianca	Is it for him you do envy me so? Nay then you jest, and now I well perceive You have but jested with me all this while: I prithee, sister Kate, untie my hands.
Katharina	If that be jest, then all the rest was so. Strikes her.
	Enter Baptista.
Baptista	Why, how now, dame! whence grows this insolence? Bianca, stand aside. Poor girl! she weeps. Go ply thy needle; meddle not with her. For shame, thou hilding of a devilish spirit, Why dost thou wrong her that did ne’er wrong thee? When did she cross thee with a bitter word?
Katharina	Her silence flouts me, and I’ll be revenged. Flies after Bianca.
Baptista	What, in my sight? Bianca, get thee in. Exit Bianca.
Katharina	What, will you not suffer me? Nay, now I see She is your treasure, she must have a husband; I must dance bare-foot on her wedding day And for your love to her