RODERICK (V.O.)
But it was not meant for me to finish my life as a man of quality and position. Indeed, I am one of those born clever enough at gaining a fortune, but incapable of keeping one; for the qualities and energy, which lead a man to accept the first, are often the very causes of his ruin in the latter case; indeed, I know of no other reason for the misfortunes which finally befell me.
RODERICK (V.O.)
At the end of the year, Lady Cosgrove presented me with a son; Patrick Cosgrove, I called him, in compliment to my royal ancestry, but what more had I to leave him than a noble name?
RODERICK (V.O.)
We spent the season in London at our house in Berkeley Square.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Her ladyship and I lived, for a while, pretty separate when in London. She preferred quiet, or, to say the truth, I preferred it, being a great friend to a modest, tranquil behavior in woman and a taste for the domestic pleasures.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Besides, she was a mother, and had great comfort in the dressing, educating, and dandling of our little Patrick for whose sake it was fit that she should give up the pleasures and frivolities of the world; so she left that part of the duty of every family of distinction to be performed by me.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Her ladyship's conversations with me were characterized by a stupid despair, or a silly blundering attempt at forced cheerfulness, still more disagreeable; hence, our intercourse was but trifling, and my temptations to carry her into the world or to remain in her society of necessity exceedingly small.
RODERICK (V.O.)
She would try my temper, at home, too, in a thousand ways. When requested by me to entertain the company with conversation, wit, and learning, of which she was a mistress; or music, of which she was an accomplished performer, she would, as often as not, begin to cry, and leave the room. My company from this, of course, fancied I was a tyrant over her; whereas, I was only a severe and careful guardian of a silly, bad-tempered and weak-minded lady.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Despite the utter distaste with which I now regarded Lady Cosgrove, and, although I took no particular pains to disguise my feelings in general, yet she was of such a mean spirit that she pursued me with her regard, and would kindle up at the smallest kind word I spoke to her.
RODERICK (V.O.)
And, in these fits of love, she was the most easy creature in the world to be persuaded, and would have signed away her whole property, had it been possible. And, I must confess, it was with very little attention on my part that I could bring her into good humor, and, up to the very last day of our being together, would be reconciled to me, and fondle me, if I addressed her a single kind word. Such is female inconsistency.
RODERICK (V.O.)
She was luckily very fond of her youngest son, and through him I had a wholesome and effectual hold on her; for if in any of her tantrums or fits of haughtiness, she pretended to have the upper-hand, to assert her authority against mine, to refuse to sign such papers as I might think necessary for the distribution of our large and complicated property.
RODERICK (V.O.)
I would have Master Patrick carried off to Chiswick for a couple of days; and I warrant me his lady-mother could hold out no longer and would agree to anything I proposed.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Lady Cosgrove and I did not quarrel more than fashionable people do, and, for the first three years, I never struck my wife but when I was in liquor.
RODERICK (V.O.)
When I flung the carving-knife at Brookside, I was drunk, as everybody present can testify, but as for having any systematic scheme against the poor lad, I can declare solemnly that, beyond merely hating him, I am guilty of no evil towards him.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Do what one would to please her, my lady would never be happy or in good humor. And soon she added a mean, detestable jealousy to all her other faults, and would weep and wring her hands, and threaten to commit suicide, and I know not what.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Her death would have been no comfort to me, as I leave any person of common prudence to imagine; for that scoundrel of a young Brookside who was about to become my greatest plague and annoyance, would have inherited every penny of the property.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Humble people envy us great men, and fancy that our lives are all pleasure. But the troubles of poverty, the rascality of agents, the quibbles of lawyers are endless. My life at this period seemed to consist of nothing but drafts of letters and money-brokers relative to the raising of money, and the insuring of Lady Cosgrove's life, and innumerable correspondence with upholsterers, decorators, cooks, horsekeepers, bailiffs, and stewards.
RODERICK (V.O.)
My own dear boy, Patrick, was now five years old, and was the most polite and engaging child ever seen; it was a pleasure to treat him with kindness and distinction; the little fellow was the pink of fashion, beauty, and good breeding. In fact, he could not have been otherwise, with the care both his parents bestowed upon him, and the attentions which were lavished upon him in every way.
RODERICK (V.O.)
Whereas, young Brookside had grown to be a very nasty and disrespectful fellow indeed. In my company, he preserved the most rigid silence, and a haughty, scornful demeanor, which was so much the more disagreeable because there was nothing in his behavior I could actually take hold of to find fault with, although his whole conduct was insolent and supercilious to the highest degree.
RODERICK (V.O.)
In addition to this, the lad was fond of spending the chief part of his time occupied with the musty old books, which he took out of the library, and which I hate to see a young man of spirit pouring over.
