vulnerability.” She stared into his dark eyes, willing him to see the truth. “Love doesn’t make you weak, Cruz. It frees you to be who you really are. What your father did to your mother wasn’t about love. It was about a weak man trying to feel powerful. The lesson you should learn is how much your mom loved you and how you took care of her. That’s where the love lives. Not in how he hit her.”
She wished she knew what to say, what combination of sounds and pauses would get through to him. But she was afraid he didn’t want to hear, didn’t want to know, didn’t want to believe.
“Jed is the same way. He doesn’t hit anyone, but he controls and demands and thinks he’s a strong man. He isn’t. It’s taken me my whole life to figure that out. I can play the game with him forever, but I’ll never win because he keeps changing the rules. I always believed one day I would do or say the right thing and he would finally accept me as his daughter and that he would love me.”
She drew in a breath. It hurt to know the truth, but it also freed her. She had to keep remembering that. “That will never happen. He can’t or won’t connect in that way. I will always love him because he’s my father, but I’m done playing the game. I’m walking away.”
A muscle twitched in Cruz’s jaw. “Lexi, you don’t know what you’re asking.”
“I do. I’m asking for you to take a chance on me, on us. I’m asking you to believe that when I say I love you that I mean it in the best way possible. I don’t want to hurt you or break you. I like that you’re strong. I love everything about you. This isn’t about changing you, it’s about us having a real relationship. One that isn’t because of convenience or connections.”
He didn’t speak. Maybe he didn’t have to. She’d known it would come to this, but why did it have to hurt so much for her to be right?
She opened her heart and her soul. “I love you, Cruz.”
He walked to the other side of the room. “I can’t, Lexi. You know I can’t. Ask me for anything else. Money, a house. Hell, I’ll buy you a country. But not this.”
Sadness combined with pain. She ached everywhere. “Love is all I want.”
She stared at his back, at the stiffness in his shoulders. There was one more thing to say.
She picked up the small plastic box she’d tucked behind a cushion on the sofa and handed it to him.
“Here.”
He turned and took the box, staring down at the pacifier.
“I’m pregnant.”
Cruz thought he’d already experienced the world shift beneath his feet. Having Lexi tell him she loved him had been a big enough shock. But this? He wondered if anything would ever be right again.
A baby?
He’d already done this. Had the unexpected and unwanted pregnancy. Not again. Dammit all to hell, not again.
He braced himself for the sense of being trapped, of knowing he was totally screwed. Instead he felt a strange warmth, a curiosity about what would happen next.
He could imagine Lexi pregnant, curvy and beautiful. But could he see himself there?
Lexi stood her ground, her chin raised. “All or nothing,” she said, her voice challenging him. “I won’t have you in and out of my baby’s life like you were with Kendra. And I’m not interested in your money. You can’t buy your way out of this problem. You have to choose. I don’t want half anything. I want a real husband who will be there for me. I want a father for my baby. I want love and commitment and a partnership. Are you too scared?”
He wasn’t afraid. It was more than that. She wanted too much. She wanted his soul and he didn’t trust anyone with that.
Her shoulders slumped. “I knew it,” she whispered. “You’re going to walk.” She pointed to the door. “Just go.”
“Lexi.”
“Go!” she yelled as tears filled her eyes.
“Lexi, I…”
“We have nothing more to say.”
Not knowing what else to do, he left. As the door closed behind him, he heard her sob and felt as if someone had reached inside and ripped out his heart.
CHAPTER TWENTY
BRONCO BILLY’S WAS having a
“Do we really want him destroyed?” Skye asked. “Can we just hurt him a little?”
“Not a good idea,” Dana told her. “He’s like one of those hydra things. Cut off one head and seven others grow back. He needs to be taken down completely.”
Izzy blinked at her. “A what?”
“A hydra. They’re mythological creatures. Kind of like a dragon.”
“I know what they are,” Skye said. “But most people don’t mention them in casual conversation.”
“Hello. Hidden depths, girlfriend, hidden depths.”
“Impressive,” Izzy murmured.
Lexi enjoyed the conversation. It was a distraction for the ache in her heart. At least thinking about what they were going to do about Garth let her move away from her own problems.
“Let’s come up with a plan,” she said. “I think we need more information. We should start an investigation. I’ve found a good lawyer who can steer us in the right direction. She has access to private investigators and researchers. It’s not cheap, but I think it will be worth it.”
Skye sighed. “All right. We’ll start with information and take it from there. I just wish he’d go away.”
“Not likely,” Izzy said. “If someone needs to make the sacrifice of seducing someone close to him, you can always count on me.”
“That makes me so proud,” Skye murmured.
Lexi looked at the women sitting with her at the table. They were her family-even Dana. They had always been there for her and would continue to be with her. They would help her stay strong.
“I’ll pay for the lawyer,” Skye said.
“Because you have all the money?” Lexi asked.
“Pretty much.”
“You’ve got mine tied up in trust,” Izzy grumbled.
“As it should be,” Dana told her. “You’re not exactly responsible. You want to go scuba diving in an underwater cave.”
“And your point is?”
“Who’s the heir?”
They laughed.
“Back to Garth,” Dana said. “You’re going to have to catch him doing something illegal. Otherwise, you’re fighting an uphill battle.”
“We could blackmail him,” Lexi said, thinking Garth would respond to that kind of threat better than anything else.
Dana sighed. “You didn’t say that and I didn’t hear it.”
“You take this upholding the law thing way too seriously,” Izzy complained.
“It means when you catch him, I can arrest him.”
“So we’re going with the lawyer?” Skye asked. “Everyone agrees?”
Lexi nodded, as did the others.
There was a moment of silence, then Dana said, “How are you doing?”
Lexi glanced up and found the other women looking at her. “I’m fine.”
