“I understand.” Ian took a bite of the food the waitress had just dropped off.
“I don’t think you do,” I said slowly. “Grandfather has always been old-fashioned, manipulative, and a bit overprotective, but the moment you pushed back, he backed off. But with me? It never stops. I’ve asked him repeatedly to stop trying to marry me off, yet he continued to do it over and over. Until I did something desperate and stupid, and now look where I am.”
“Granddad can’t make you do anything you don’t want to do. You have money and a career, so technically, you can do whatever the hell you want.”
“I dinnae ken what to do,” I whispered, dropping my eyes. After three years at Harvard and my advanced degrees, I didn’t often let my Gaelic drop into conversation like this, but I was on the verge of tears and it came out anyway.
Ian reached across the table and covered one of my hands with his. “What can I do to help?”
“I wish I knew.” I dabbed at my eyes with my napkin and finally looked up at him. “I love him, and I think he loves me too, but this is so much more complicated than I thought it would be when we agreed to go out on a few dates and see where things went. Should I end things? Tell me the truth, because he’s your best friend and I know how much you care about him.”
He hesitated. “I think it’s too soon to answer that. The two of you need to come to a decision together, instead of avoiding the hard questions. Beyond that, you also need to have a heart-to-heart with Granddad. I don’t think what he’s been doing is fair, and it has to be addressed. Whether you stay with Dax or not, he can’t continue to manipulate you. I wish you’d told me what was going on. I meant to have a talk with him when I was there this summer but the wedding and such got in the way.”
“You didn’t need to start any family drama in the midst of all that.”
“I believe Granddad and I are going to have a chat sometime in the near future, but until then, stand up for yourself. What do you have to lose?”
I sighed. “Like I said, you’re not there and you haven’t been in a long time. Mostly, his machinations aren’t a big deal because I spend almost all of my time working. I deal with him by not being there. In fact, I’m considering moving out, getting my own apartment, because I truly don’t want to deal with it anymore.”
Ian continued to eat, not saying anything for a while. Finally, he looked up at me. “I don’t think I’m the person you should be talking about this to. I want what’s best for you but I don’t think you know what that is. And until you do, my opinions and advice are useless. You and Dax both have a bit of individual soul-searching to do before you can do anything together.”
I looked up and pushed my plate away. I’d lost my appetite and suddenly wished I hadn’t even come to breakfast. Ian knew me better than anyone and could read me like a book. He was seeing all the problems I’d been trying to keep buried deep in my subconscious. One thing was clear, though: I had to have this conversation with Dax, no matter how much I didn’t want to.
20
Dax
Isla was acting a little weird after Ian dropped her off, and I was trying to work up the nerve to ask her if everything was okay when she came out of the bedroom with a sad look on her face. She was wearing shorts and a tank top, her skin tanner than it had ever been since I’d known her, after spending time outdoors here in Vegas. Unfortunately, she looked as sad as she did beautiful and I had a feeling something bad was coming.
So I just held out my hand and she took it.
“Something on your mind?” I asked gently.
She met my gaze but was on the verge of tears. “Yes. I suppose.”
“You don’t have to be nervous with me, honey. Come talk to me.” I sank onto the couch and she dropped down beside me.
“I think we’ve reached a point where we have to talk about the future. I’ve been avoiding it because I can’t think of a way for us to be together, but I don’t want to be without you either.”
I sighed because I’d been having all the same thoughts. “I know, beautiful. I’ve been thinking the same things. And while I’d love for you to come here and be with me full-time, I know it’s not realistic.”
“If you want to end things, and—”
“No.” I interrupted her before she could say anything else. “Ending things isn’t even on the top ten things of what I want to do going forward. If you’re willing to try, we’ll figure this out.”
“I’m willing to try almost anything,” she said, “but I’ve racked my brain all summer and don’t have any suggestions.”
“That’s mostly my fault,” I admitted. “How can you decide what you want to do when you don’t know what I want to do? Especially since I don’t even know what I want to do.”
The irony made me snort a little and she finally smiled. It lit up her face and I leaned down to kiss her, my mouth grazing hers playfully. “The idea of breaking things off is more than I can stand,” I whispered. “I adore you, Isla, and I’ll move heaven and earth to keep you in my life.”
“You…will?” Her eyes were filled with confusion and hope and longing. “I don’t know that there’s anything about me someone should move heaven and earth for, but—”
I didn’t want to hear another word and bent my head, covering her mouth with mine. I tugged her onto my lap and circled her waist with one arm
