I drive up the long pathway, and the white farmhouse, which is freshly painted and glowing with the warm light inside, comes into view.
Once I stop the car, I see a silhouette standing in the open doorway, and it isn’t my brother or Ellie.
Fuck. I’m never going to survive this.
Chapter Six
Sydney
I’m going to murder my best friend. She lured me over for dinner, saying she wanted to talk. Despite the fact that all I wanted to do was stay curled up in my bed, crying about the current status of my life, I came. Then I come to find out that it’s some kind of family dinner and Declan was fucking coming.
Of course, she doesn’t relay this piece of information until his car is turning into the driveway and it’s too late for me to escape.
He parks close enough to the house that I can see him in the driver’s seat, but he doesn’t move to get out, as if he’s waiting for something.
“Is Declan here?” Ellie’s sweet voice asks from behind me.
“Yes.”
“Are you going out there?”
I turn to her with lips pursed. “Whatever you’re up to, I don’t like it.”
Her hands rise in mock surrender. “I’m not up to anything. All I’m doing is forcing the two of you to deal with your crap. He’s going to be my brother-in-law, and you’re my best friend. You guys need to find a way to at least be nice to each other.”
I roll my eyes. “I love you, Ells, but I’m going to have to kill you.”
“I’ll take my chances. You couldn’t hurt a fly.”
“I’m going to go out there first,” I say, not wanting to continue this.
I’m not ready to tell him about the baby or anything really. I still don’t know what I’m going to do, and while this is his baby, it isn’t his life that’ll be completely changed. I want to go to the doctor first, make sure everything is okay, and then decide on a plan before I tell him.
I don’t know what my plan is yet, but I do know that it won’t include him.
Not because I don’t love him but because he doesn’t love me, and I won’t let myself be broken again.
“You know, the sad thing is that you’re both nervous about being around the other. I don’t know why you’re fighting it.”
I glare at her. “You can’t imagine the level of hurt he’s caused me. He loved me and walked away. He was supposed to be the one person who would never leave me. There isn’t a memory in my childhood that doesn’t star one of these Arrowood brothers and then ... one day ... they were gone. Like. That”—I snap my fingers—“I lost my family, my heart, and my future. I’m fighting because, if I allow even an inch of hope, it’ll run away, and I’ll be lost.”
Ellie bites her lower lip, her hands wringing as she nods. “I understand.”
Damn it. I shouldn’t snap at her. She means well, even if she isn’t helping. I’ve only told her bits and pieces because the whole thing is too much to handle.
I want the two of us to possibly be amicable so we can untangle this mess we’re both in, if that’s even possible. Ellie is being a good friend, and I should be thanking her, not biting her head off.
“I’m sorry for being such a bitch.”
She steps forward quickly. “You’re not. No, I’m being an idiot and not realizing that just because Connor and I found a way, that doesn’t mean you can as well. I’m the one who owes you an apology.”
I look back out the screen door to find him still sitting there. “Let me go and make peace. I know you guys have a big announcement tonight, and I don’t want you to worry about my and Declan’s fucked-up past.”
Before she can say anything, I push the door open and make my way down the steps as he’s exiting his car.
“Syd.”
“Dec.”
“I didn’t know you’d be here.” He runs his hands through his hair.
I give him a soft smile. “I didn’t know you’d be here either. We were apparently kept in the dark.”
He glares up at the window and I follow his gaze to find Connor there with a grin. Asshole.
“About the last time I was here,” Declan says, but I’m already shaking my head.
“Not now. Not here either. There’s a lot to say, but this isn’t the time.”
Declan nods once. “All right.”
Regardless of my feelings for Declan, we’re going to have a child. I can blame him, hate him, and all that, but that isn’t the life I want for my child. I grew up unwanted by my father. I watched him walk away, saying things that no child should hear her father say about her mother. My father hated my mother, and since my sister and I were part of her, he hated us by default. I will do whatever I can to protect a child from feeling that level of pain and that means that Declan and I have to figure out a way to get along.
“I didn’t want for us to see each other for the first time since that night to be in front of them, so I came out here.”
He releases a heavy sigh. “We have a lot of history, and I want to say that I’m sorry about what happened between us a couple of months ago.”
My eyes lift, studying his. “What about it?”
“That I hurt you again,” Declan says quickly. “I should never have come to you when I had no intention of staying after my time was up. I should’ve … fuck, I don’t know. I never should’ve let things go so far. I’m sorry.”
He has no idea how far things are. “And what now?”
“What do you mean?”
I steel myself, knowing what the
