I sat down next to her while she stared at the ground. Rachel just held my hand lovingly, shaking. I grew nervous.
"It's okay, Rachel," I whispered, trying to get her to breathe, and be comfortable enough to tell me what was bothering her.
"I went along with Mark at first," She said it really quickly to get it over with, making the words come close to combining with each other.
I felt anger come over me on a drop of a dime. Here I was worried to death about her and she had gone along with it. I beat up one of my close friends for Rachel. She had wanted another man touching her. I told her I loved her and she goes along with another guy. Rachel went with him knowing that he was going to touch her, to kiss her. She must have known that. I couldn't believe how furious I was at her.
"Nick, I'm so sorry."
"You little slut!" I yelled, not caring about volume anymore as my blood started to boil.
"Nick, I thought it was you at first because of all the alcohol." Her eyes tried to grab mine.
I ripped my hand out of hers, but I could tell she knew I was going to do that. Rachel just hung her head down low with her hair falling over her face like a curtain.
"How the hell could you think that...," I couldn't say it, "…that Mark was me?"
My face was scrunched up in disgust.
"I was very drunk, but when I saw his brown eyes they weren't your loving blue ones," she pleaded.
I felt sick with rage. "How the hell could you let some other guy touch you?" I growled, my hands stiffening into trembling fists by my sides. "I told you I loved you and you go and do that! How could you do such a thing?" I was standing in front of her now, but she still wouldn't look at me. She sat there in silence and played with her fingers nervously. I was frustrated and couldn't believe that I was also upset at the same time, though I only let the fury show as it won being the stronger emotion. "Look at me, Rachel and answer the damn questions!"
"I thought he was you! Please stop yelling!" Rachel was bending over, rubbing her head and her voice was breaking up like she was going to cry. Normally it would hurt me to see her like this, but I didn't even care right now. I was in pain, and it was her fault. I was just returning the favor. After all that we went through the last few hours alone.
"Go to hell, Rachel."
"Nick, please." She was looking at me now, begging with all her might.
"Get the fuck out of my sight."
Rachel ran to her room and I heard it lock behind her. I went back to the table and had another beer. While I was drinking I heard a few weird noises in Rachel's room. I got up and found that her door was unlocked so I went in, not bothering to knock like I normally would. Rachel wasn't in her room, but her window was wide open with the cheap curtains flying with the up-coming storm-wind blowing into her room, almost waving in mockery.
Where did she go? Will she come back? Of course Rachel would come back. Rachel loved me whether she wanted to admit it or not. I knew that, so she would come back. She’d just be very scared when she came back, a nervous little rabbit, not sure what to do. Plus where else could she go? Someone ran to their parent's house a month ago and was dragged back here by the cops.
I went back to the table and put the beer can down and looked at it. I started tracing the top of the can with my fingers. I zoned out of the world that wasn't me and the beer before me.
Later that night I still hadn't moved unless it was to drink more beer. A nasty storm had been coming down for an hour, but there was no sign of Rachel showing up. Why didn't I care as much that she wasn't here? Then I poured another can of beer down my throat. It was a little weird that I hadn't gone out to go get her before it got worse outside. That was when I heard the door open quietly, so I put my can down and went to the door.
Rachel was absolutely drenched from the rain and I brought her in, feeling her slightly shivering. She finally gazed at me and I could tell a tear never fell from her wide eyes, but she was remorseful.
"Nick..." she spoke softly, locking eyes with me.
"Shh…" I interrupted with a soothing voice, pressing a finger to her lips gently.
I brought Rachel to me a little tighter than I had meant too. I brought my fingers from her lips back a little to stroke her jaw to her lips feeling the rain on her drip onto me and my clothes. I bent down and captured Rachel's lips with mine, a little rougher than normal really pushing against her lips to lengthen the kiss, but she tore away and narrowed her eyes at me.
"You're drunk aren't you?"
"Eh, just a little," I shrugged my eyes on her lips instead of her eyes. I brushed some of Rachel's soaked hair back as she tried to pull away from my grip. Her face cringed in anger as she tried to push away again. Rachel was not going anywhere, or making any progress.
"Let go of me, Nick," Rachel snapped.
"So you'll let Mark touch you, but not me." I constricted my grip as I jerked her a little so that she would look at me.
"I was drunk," Rachel shrieked.
"Well I'm drunk now. It'll even things out," I responded bringing my lips near hers again.
"No, Nick you're better than this. Get a hold of yourself. I know
