Hunters, to capture your Quarry's heart, it's not enough to just make her feel loved. Figurheowshe needs to be loved— to what degree, for what qualities. Make her feel loved in precisely the way she
wants to be loved. You will beat out men who are stronger, handsomer, richer, and brighter than you.
Love and being loved is that important to a woman.
Magic Words to Make Her Love You
Just as using the right words to feed a man's sexual fantasy is crucial, Hunters must use the right words to feed a woman's relationship fantasy. How do you find the right words? By asking, listening, and keeping your antennae always tuned. Pick up signals when she is talking about past lovers, about her relationship with her parents, and about what she likes or dislikes about her various friends.
You might also need to find a way to cut to the core and excavate the kernel you need to plant the seeds of love. Ask your Quarry what love means to her.
Choose a relaxed moment, perhaps over a dinner at a restaurant, and then, lightheartedly, tell her you were reading a book about how everybody likes to be loved in different ways—how people have vastly different ideas of what a relationship should be.
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Simply ask her, ' If someone fell in love with you, how would you most like to be loved?' She may hesitate in embarrassment, but persist. You'll get your ammunition, your kernel. Ten women will give you ten different answers. A thousand women will give yo u a thousand different answers. You'll be stunned at the diversity of the replies, but one thing will be consistent. With each woman, the same words will pop up several times.
Hunters, if you were trying to make my friend Dana fall in love with you, you would tell her, "Dana, your beautiful voice drives me to destruction ." If you had set your sights on Katharine, you would say,
"Katharine, you are number one in my life." Those are the trigger words, the golden keys, to open their particular hearts.
TECHNIQUE #82 (MORE FOR HUNTERS):
RELATIONSHIP TRIGGER WORDS
First, ask her "What is love?" to find out how your Quarry would most like to be loved.
While she is answering you, listen carefully for trigger words. Do not use them immediately, but when it comes time to say "I love you," weave in these special words.
Huntresses, Relationship Trigger Words Work for You, Too
Men also have specific ways of wanting to be loved.
However, there's an additional twist you can use to find out how your Quarry wants to be loved. Uncover his source of pride, and use the magic words that describe it.
One man might want a woman who loves him because he is brilliant. Another needs to feel he is sexually irresistible. Still
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another might yearn to be Peter Pan, who is loved for his boyishness.
A friend of mine named John, a lawyer, recently became engaged. John is very proud that he had brought himself up by his bootstraps. In fact, that's one of his favorite phrases, and I've heard him use it over and over. His father was a street cleaner, and John put himself though college and then law school.
One time John and I were talking about his fiancée, Lisa. He told me, "Lisa understands that I brought myself up by my bootstraps and admires me for that."
I thought to myself, "Does Lisa really admire that?
Or is Lisa a very smart woman who understands that is John's source of pride?"
Once I had a tenant, a handsome young police officer named Karl, who dated a lot of women. Knowing of my interest in relationships, he often told me about his girlfriend-of-the-week. Karl's recurring phrase was, "I think she really digs my style." Probably none of the girls he was dating actually said the words,
"Karl, Idig your style ," but if one of them was smart enough to pick up on those words, she'd be hitting his hot button.
Huntresses, make a man feel you love and admire him for the qualities he's most proud of. Chances are your Quarry has even inadvertently fed you the right words to use on him. Practically everybody has favorite relationship words. John'sbrought myself up by my bootstraps and Karl's digs my stylewere latchkeys to winning their love. Echoing those phrases back is taking direct aim at these men's hearts with your Cupid's bow.
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Every now and then Huntresses eat their hearts out and tear their hair out over confirmed bachelor Quarry—the older, attractive man who is single and never been married. You've met the type. You'd think he could have his pick. He dates beautiful women and he has affairs with them. But his relationships never last more than a couple of months. When his friends ask him what he's waiting for, he just smiles, shrugs, and says, "Oh, the right woman hasn't come along yet."
Is this type of bachelor Quarry lying? Is he determined to stay single until the day he dies?
Usually not. Usually, he's not lying and, yes, usually the right woman for him just hasn't come along yet.
What he doesn't tell you is that he meanssexually the right woman hasn't come along yet.
Jerry was the perfect example of the man-about-town everyone thought of as a determined, persistent, resolute bachelor. In fact, Jerry was the most eligible bachelor in his hometown social scene. He was good-looking, about forty, and very personable. He had an exciting job as the host of a local television talk show.
Sometimes Jerry's TV guests would even ask him on the air, "Jerry, when are you going to settle down?"
or, "Jerry, every woman in town is after you. When are you going
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to choose the lucky girl?" Jerry's answer was always the same: "The right woman hasn't come along yet."
Huntresses, if you should find yourself attracted
