refined type, counts, and society aristocrats. Only really I am afraid of you. You sometimes use words that one never hears in good society.
| Governor |
What of it? A word doesn’t hurt. |
| Anna |
It’s all right when you are a town-governor, but there the life is entirely different. |
| Governor |
Yes, they say there are two kinds of fish there, the sea-eel and the smelt, and before you start to eat them, the saliva flows in your mouth. |
| Anna |
That’s all he thinks about—fish. I shall insist upon our house being the first in the capital and my room having so much amber in it that when you come in you have to shut your eyes. She shuts her eyes and sniffs. Oh, how good! |
Scene II
The same and the Merchants.
| Governor |
Ah, how do you do, my fine fellows? |
| Merchants |
Bowing. We wish you health, father. |
| Governor |
Well, my dearly beloved friends, how are you? How are your goods selling? So you complained against me, did you, you tea tanks, you scurvy hucksters? Complain, against me? You crooks, you pirates, you. Did you gain a lot by it, eh? Aha, you thought you’d land me in prison? May seven devils and one she-devil take you! Do you know that— |
| Anna |
Good heavens, Antosha, what words you use! |
| Governor |
Irritated. Oh, it isn’t a matter of words now. Do you know that the very official to whom you complained is going to marry my daughter? Well, what do you say to that? Now I’ll make you smart. You cheat the people, you make a contract with the government, and you do the government out of a hundred thousand, supplying it with rotten cloth; and when you give fifteen yards away gratis, you expect a reward besides. If they knew, they would send you to—And you strut about sticking out your paunches with a great air of importance: “I’m a merchant, don’t touch me.” “We,” you say, “are as good as the nobility.” Yes, the nobility, you monkey-faces. The nobleman is educated. If he gets flogged in school, it is for a purpose, to learn something useful. And you—start out in life learning trickery. Your master beats you for not being able to cheat. When you are still little boys and don’t know the Lord’s Prayer, you already give short measure and short weight. And when your bellies swell and your pockets fill up, then you assume an air of importance. Whew! What marvels! Because you guzzle sixteen samovars full a day, that’s why you put on an air of importance. I spit on your heads and on your importance. |
| Merchants |
Bowing. We are guilty, Anton Antonovich. |
| Governor |
Complaining, eh? And who helped you with that grafting when you built a bridge and charged twenty thousand for wood when there wasn’t even a hundred rubles’ worth used? I did. You goat beards. Have you forgotten? If I had informed on you, I could have despatched you to Siberia. What do you say to that? |
| A Merchant |
I’m guilty before God, Anton Antonovich. The evil spirit tempted me. We will never complain against you again. Ask whatever satisfaction you want, only don’t be angry. |
| Governor |
Don’t be angry! Now you are crawling at my feet. Why? Because I am on top now. But if the balance dipped the least bit your way, then you would trample me in the very dirt—you scoundrels! And you would crush me under a beam besides. |
| Merchants |
Prostrating themselves. Don’t ruin us, Anton Antonovich. |
| Governor |
Don’t ruin us! Now you say, don’t ruin us! And what did you say before? I could give you—Shrugging his shoulders and throwing up his hands. Well, God forgive you. Enough. I don’t harbor malice for long. Only look out now. Be on your guard. My daughter is going to marry, not an ordinary nobleman. Let your congratulations be—you understand? Don’t try to get away with a dried sturgeon or a loaf of sugar. Well, leave now, in God’s name. |
|
Merchants leave. |
Scene III
The same, Ammos Fiodorovich, Artemy Filippovich, then Rastakovsky.
| Ammos |
In the doorway. Are we to believe the report, Anton Antonovich? A most extraordinary piece of good fortune has befallen you, hasn’t it? |
| Artemy |
I have the honor to congratulate you on your unusual good fortune. I was glad from the bottom of my heart when I heard it. Kisses Anna’s hand. Anna Andreyevna! Kissing Marya’s hand. Marya Antonovna! |
|
Rastakovsky enters. |
| Rastakovsky |
I congratulate you, Anton Antonovich. May God give you and the new couple long life and may He grant you numerous progeny—grandchildren and greatgrandchildren. Anna Andreyevna! Kissing her hand. Marya Antonovna! Kissing her hand. |
Scene IV
The same, Korobkin and his wife, Liuliukov.
| Korobkin |
I have the honor to congratulate you, Anton Antonovich, and you, Anna Andreyevna kissing her hand and you Marya Antonovna kissing her hand. |
| Korobkin’s Wife |
I congratulate you from the bottom of my heart, Anna Andreyevna, on your new stroke of good fortune. |
| Liuliukov |
I have the honor to congratulate you, Anna Andreyevna. Kisses her hand and turns to the audience, smacks his lips, putting on a bold front. Marya Antonovna, I have the honor to congratulate you. Kisses her hand and turns to the audience in the same way. |
Scene V
A number of Guests enter. They kiss Anna’s hand saying: “Anna Andreyevna,” then Marya’s hand, saying “Marya Antonovna.”
Bobchinsky and Dobchinsky enter jostling each other.
| Bobchinsky |
I have the honor to congratulate you. |
| Dobchinsky |
Anton Antonovich, I have the honor to congratulate you. |
| Bobchinsky |
On the happy event. |
| Dobchinsky |
Anna Andreyevna! |
| Bobchinsky |
Anna Andreyevna! |
|
They bend over her hand at the same time and bump foreheads. |
| Dobchinsky |
Marya Antonovna! Kisses her hand. I have the honor to congratulate you. You will enjoy the greatest happiness. You will wear garments of gold and eat the most delicate soups, and you will pass your time most entertainingly. |
| Bobchinsky |
Breaking in. God give |
